EF has called me, sobbing, telling me that 'Mom has died'.
My first reaction was to rush to the place where he was, to be there, to comfort him.
My heart was thumping as fast as never before, and I've tried to search my soul as quickly as I could to find something inside myself. A feeling, a thought, anything that would have been appropriate. The only thing I've found was...
Relief. Safety. And happiness. And pity for EF.
It took minutes until I've realized that EF was babbling about DGM and not NM.
Suddenly I felt the deepest disappointment rushing through me.
All my thoughts and feelings are gone now. I feel nothing but guilt.
I am the worst person in the world.